A Pittsburgh, Pa Joys of Motherhood Portrait Session

Preserving the Beauty of Motherhood

This story is written as a personal testimony.

Where do I begin? I have found that the best stories are the ones I tell you myself, in my own words. It is important to know a little something about me before I tell you this story, I am a crier. Do you know the Subaru commercials? Oh yeah, they get me every time. God seems to have blessed me with an empathetic spirit, I feel everything very deeply. This has been a blessing and a curse.

What happens when you feel everything very deeply? You cry…a lot. However, you make stronger connections with people you barely know, and you probably share more than you should. My toxic trait is over-sharing. I treat everyone like we have known each other forever, and I share stories like they are family, even though I probably shouldn’t do that. I would probably have more friends!

Now that you know that little nugget about me, let me tell you about this stunning woman, Natalie. How do I even begin to tell you about her? She came to me as a wedding client, I had never met her before, but when I came to Pittsburgh to do her and Ben’s engagement session, we had a whole hoot!

We were at the Strip District, the bridges, we were just out having a good time, doing what I do best, exploring for the location as I shoot the session. Natalie has that “it” factor. That personality you think doesn’t exist. She is an educated, strong woman who is confident but humble and kind. She is so loving and respectful of my art, she trusts me fully and has followed me into the rain, and we have seen a few sunsets together.

Every time I offer a mini session, even if it is 2 hours away, Natalie is emailing me, saying she is so excited.

Whether she is driving from Pittsburgh at 3am to meet me for a 5am sunrise session, or I am driving to her in Pittsburgh to watch another city sunset during her session, she has always been full of light and an absolute joy to photograph. Natalie is also a badass commercial pilot.

The Email I wasn’t Expecting

Natalie had been scheduled to do the Spring “Mom and Me Mini Sessions” in Tyrone. However, because we live in Pennsylvania, we were rained out. I ended up not rescheduling the sessions for a whole new date because I had been in a lot of pain with endometriosis. One day led to another and before I knew it, it was June.

We had planned to have a session at Canoe Creek in June 28, and I got an email saying Natalie would not be able to make it. As I opened my email, and began to read it, I started bawling my eyes out. Natalie had a massive brain tumor and had emergency brain surgery. She would not be able to travel and was not able to fly planes currently. Her entire world was turned upside down. She didn’t know the timeline, but time is a fickle thing. You never know how much you have.

Our shoot was scheduled for Mother’s Day. She was starting chemotherapy the second week of July. Which meant, I had to get to her. There was not even a glimmer of a thought of another option. I didn’t care about anything in that moment except how to get this beautiful woman her pictures with her baby girl.

Money was not even a thought, I just needed to do this for her. Here comes that empathy thing that God gave me. As I begin to process the idea, what would I want most if I was a mom with a new baby and this is the storm I am living in? Pictures. Pictures of me looking and feeling beautiful with my little girl.

That Monday, I drove to Pittsburgh to see Natalie and get her these pictures. But they are so much more than that aren’t they? Memories. How do you save a memory? We capture them and live through the pictures.

This session was even more special because I brought my daughter along with me to help. She was absolutely amazing. She carried gear for me, made the baby laugh and just brought joy to the entire session. She is my shining light.

The Second Email I wasn’t Expecting

After our session, I hugged Avery a little tighter.

I read an email around 10pm on July 6. I want to share what she told me.

“It’s super late, but wanted to give you an update from my appt today.

While the news wasn’t the best news, it also was not the worst news.

The official diagnosis is I have a astrocytoma (I think that’s it), which is basically a grade 4 highly aggressive tumor. Because of a mutation that the tumor had, it is not what my uncle had, which was a glioblastoma, meaning that what I have is actually treatable, and I actually have a fighting chance of being able to see my baby girl grow up.

Life expectancy for this tumor is around 5 to 15 years, but with my age and several other factors in my favor, the doctor is fairly confident I can push the boundary on the latter end given the fact the surgery was so successful.”

God’s Got This

When I read this email, I couldn’t help but have an overwhelming burst of tears and emotion come out. As she said, it is not the best news, but it isn’t the worst news. As you learned earlier, I am a crier. I managed to get through the entire session without crying. Just laughing, joy and another sunset. It was on the top of the parking garage where I hugged and held mom, as she told me the story of how she lost her brother to cancer.

You know, every now and then I know God must be talking for me, because the emotional me wanted to bawl my eyes out. But I didn’t. I looked at her and I told her that she couldn’t ask for a more loyal servant to pray for Natalie and that we serve a God of miracles. God has answered my prayers many times. He doesn’t always do it when I ask, or how I imagined it. He always hears me. I told mom, God will hear me, I promise.

Every single night from June 28 – present, Avery and I have prayed for Natalie. God, please let her daughter know her. Please let her get to watch her daughter grow up, God. Put your healing hands on her body and make her strong. July 1, we did her pictures. By July 6, I received that email.

The power of prayer is unbelievable. Please keep praying.

Open Letter to Natalie

When it’s raining, it is easy to focus on the storm. You know one of my favorite smells is that fresh rain on concrete smell, in the summer, right after it rains. My favorite memory of you is the clear umbrellas and the rainy session on your wedding day evening. How magical was that? I feel there is something that you need to hear from me, so here it is.

God was tempted in the desert for 40 days by the enemy. During the flood, it rained for 40 days straight. In the bible there are so many times where 40 represents the amount of time someone is struggling. Satan wants you to focus on your 40 days. God says, but your 41 is coming. I will be here when the rain stops, and its day 41. So, until then, I am praying for you, and Avery is praying for you. You are beautiful. Inside and out. I hope these captured everything you hoped they would. And I will see you soon.

Love,

Kim